john_l’heureux – blackandwhiteandcolours

And it felt right and true.

“I’m free”, he said aloud again, just to hear it.

He didn’t know how to think anymore.

It’s sad. It’s a sad story.

I probably shouldn’t have told you that.

There’s nothing the matter.

Everything’s fine.

This was how it would go.

But now it had happened again.

They should just wait and see, the doctor said.

Maybe he just has nothing to say.

He disappears into the long black line.

They stood in little groups.

Everyone agreed that it was beautiful.

Some time went by, maybe an hour or maybe a day.

Hold on to that sense of humor.

Even saints get bored of waiting.

It happened slowly.

Saints are not the easiest companions.

I’m not good with time.

Maybe things happened. Maybe I failed to imagine them.

This is wrong, it’s untrue, nothing is going to be all right.

I was not me.

I was full of thoughts, some of them rational.

All hopeless.

It was all meaningless.

I tried not to show what I was thinking.

I gave him a hard look, and he looked back.

He didn’t belong and I didn’t know why.

My head had been bothering me lately.

People were a mystery, I decided.

I began to understand that people disappeared and changed.